The Violet Lenten Rose (An Original Poem)

,   

Roses of faith are violet

Sinful thoughts are blue,

Lent calls us to repentance,

"Make us all anew!"

Break free from the guilt,

Forgive those who hurt,

Wipe away the anger,

Push away the murk,

Which feeds the soul with lies,

Keeps us all imprisoned,

Away from God's love,

Trapped in our own vision....

Of what life is all about,

A slave in our own mind,

How can we change?

So much to leave behind.

Violet engages our eyes,

The color of forgiveness rests,

In the priest's absolution,

No longer in spiritual death.

The Eucharist gives us life,

The Body of Our Lord,

The Crimson reminding us

Of the blood from the sword.

Violet roses bloom,

As Lent passes onward,

Fragrant smell of penance,

Bring us eternal reward.

Pray, fast, and give!

Misgivings and Misunderstandings

As part of my Lenten journey, I've been reflecting a lot on how I've treated people over the past year.  It hasn't always been in the most loving way.  I find that so many times I think, say and even write things I later regret. Then, I have to deal with the consequences.  Very few people push me away forever, especially those who know me very well and understand how I think, but a few do move on.  I've seriously offended them and they just can no longer deal with it.  Friendliness is replaced by cold and silence.  I've burned bridges.

I've prayed to the Lord: "Can you please change my personality so I'm not so prone to misgivings and misunderstandings?  Tame my tongue so I'm not so brutally honest.  Can you help me move away from egotism so I'm not so quick to bark at someone who I misconstrue as a threat to my livelihood? I want to become a positive and more compassionate woman yet I'm naturally drawn into myself and my own troubles.  I forget how my actions affect others."

I find sometimes frequent misunderstandings with a particular person may be a sign to break ties and move on.  We all meet people who serve a purpose in our lives but only for a limited amount of time.  We like them and appreciate them.  They helped us out in an important capacity. However, tensions and misunderstandings form which leave us bitter and confused.  We know in our hearts we much detach and let go.  Maybe the person is a lover, a spouse, a spiritual healer, or even a best friend.  

Letting go and moving on can be incredibly stressful and emotionally gut wrenching.  It's like going through withdrawal symptoms.  Sometimes relationships can become just as addictive as a substance like alcohol and drugs.  We take the leap of courage, telling the person we simply have to cut communication with them just to only go back to him/her, pleading for forgiveness.  We look foolish in the process.  The person may take us back or may decide we are too "difficult" to deal with.  If we had only stuck with our decision and didn't waver!  

For me personally, if I need to break communication with someone who has an emotional and/or physical hold on me the most effective strategy is to let go in silence.  Don't tell him how much my feelings are hurt or what's wrong with him.  Certainly don't lose my cool.  Just quietly and peacefully walk away and disappear for good.  No drama necessary. Quietly go through the mourning period understanding that God and our Holy Mother is there for reassurance.

As I grow older, I've realized how much we as humans think so radically differently.  As a result of these differences, we don't all get along or even understand one another.  The whole "he said/she said" scenerio is a perfect example.

During this Lent, try to forgive and forget.  Try to get past misgivings and misunderstandings.  Turn to Our Lord in prayer asking him for help.  

-J.

Dear Lord, Please Answer My Prayers!

Thursday of the First Week of Lent

(Click Here For Readings)

Book of Esther C:12, 14-16, 23-25

Queen Esther 

Queen Esther, seized with mortal anguish,

had recourse to the LORD. She lay prostrate upon the ground, together with her handmaids, from morning until evening, and said:“God of Abraham, God of Isaac, and God of Jacob, blessed are you. Help me, who am alone and have no help but you, for I am taking my life in my hand. As a child I used to hear from the books of my forefathers that you, O LORD, always free those who are pleasing to you.Now help me, who am alone and have no one but you, O LORD, my God..."

I highly recommend reading the Book of Esther.  It's a beautiful story of courage in a turbulent time period with women treated as sexual objects and the Jewish people targeted for massacre.  Esther is a beautiful orphan chosen as Queen by the powerful King Ahasuerus. She hides her Jewish faith in order to protect herself, and her cousin Mordecai, from certain death. Esther is considered a heroine of the Jewish people.  I won't go into too much more of the story since it's such a great read!  

Queen Esther petitioned her requests to God, fasting and praying for an answer.  She felt all alone, struggling with her hidden Jewish identity.  Should she proclaim the truth to the King?  How so?  Will God help her?  She did not give up hope that her Jewish people would be saved!  

I think we've all at one time or another prayed to God to hear only dead silence.  We don't quite know what He wants us to do.  We look for signs and clues.  Sometimes they are so subtle and unnoticeable that they don't seem to amount to much.  Other times the silence forces us to wait patiently for an answer.  God is not in a hurry to save the day, and he doesn't necessarily give us what we want.  It's always what we need and at the appropriate time.

I remember in high school I wanted to become a member of the drill team!  I signed up for the Pep Squad my sophomore year.  We had to wear these horrendous blue uniforms to all of the football games. (The "real" drill team wore cute outfits.) I remember one jealous girl calling me "Smurfette" as she sneered and laughed at me.  During that semester, I worked so hard to perfect my high kicks and splits.  At night I often prayed:  "Dear Jesus, please answer my prayers and allow me to make the RLT Drill Team.  I so want to wear the sparkly uniform and white boots!"  

Unfortunately, I didn't make the team.  It was a huge blow to my self-worth.  I was absolutely devastated and angry to boot.  I wasted nearly a year preparing for something totally worthless.  One thing good out of this disappointment was a complete reversal of course.  Because I didn't make the drill team, with first period practice, I was able to take an Advanced Business Computer course which helped me land temporary positions throughout summers of college.  So, in effect Jesus answered my prayers in a totally different way.  He thought it best I become educated instead of popular. No tarting around in a skimpy little uniform but busy learning software!  I could always take dance lessons later but for now learning computers was the plan.

Now that I reflect on the incident years ago, God planted so many "signs" that the drill team wasn't right for me.  I missed mock trials because of my Close-Up trip to Washington D.C.  I probably could have "fixed" some techniques if I'd gone to trials, but I thought the D.C. trip was totally worth it!  Then, toward the end of the semester the Drill team instructor resigned.  I absolutely loved her, so sad to see her go.  Later the new instructor hired turned out to be terrible.  The drill team never looked good afterwards.  Plus, the other girls on the team were snooty and witchy.  One of my best friends made the team that year, and later she told me it was a terrible experience for her.  She said everybody gave her the cold shoulder except for maybe two or three girls.  The cattiness and jealousy was too much for her.

I can't stress enough:  Pray for what you need and what will help you.  Try not to pray for what you want, especially if you know deep inside it may not be good.  It's important to discern what the Lord thinks is best for you and leave it up to Him to provide it for you.

What's so interesting is every time I even THINK about stopping this blog and going on to something else I'm tugged back into my writing ministry.  Lately, I've received quite a number of emails from people how much they enjoy it.  THANK-YOU!  It makes me feel good to be a source of inspiration for others.  I keep each one of my readers in my daily prayers!

St. Lucy, Pray for Us!!

-J.

Infinite Chances At Repentance

Wednesday of the First Week of Lent

(Click Here for Readings)

Book of Jonah 3:1-10

 “Neither man nor beast, neither cattle nor sheep, shall taste anything; they shall not eat, nor shall they drink water. Man and beast shall be covered with sackcloth and call loudly to God; every man shall turn from his evil way and from the violence he has in hand. Who knows, God may relent and forgive, and withhold his blazing wrath, so that we shall not perish.”

Broken Lenten promise.  Okay, it's confession time. I bought a bottle of wine and enjoyed two glasses yesterday evening. I planned to give up wine for the entire 40 days of Lent, but I didn't even last one week.  I feel guilty for going against my wine-imbibing fast.  I'm supposed to be changing for the better, right?  Let go of old habits and adopt new ones?  Practice what I preach?! Uh oh....

God could have squeezed me inside an empty wine bottle just like Jonah inside the belly of the whale! Toss me into the sea as my conscience screamed out, "Jen, you should never have bought that bottle of Fetzer sustainably-grown Cabernet!  You'd be safe and sound watching "Titanic" snuggling up with puppy instead of getting sea sick inside this bottle!  What kind of message are you sending to your blog readers?!".....

One thing that is so awesome about God is that he gives us infinite chances at repentance.  He understands we are all broken, easily falling into temptation.  Satan is diabolically vigilant this time of the year, poking his sharp pitchfork into our minds and hearts in hopes that we will totally screw up!  The more times we do "break" our fast, our prayer routine, and our almsgiving the more he laughs at us.  I certainly don't want the likes of Lucifer stinkin' up my Lent.  Do you?

Stinkin' Thinkin'  I came across the phrase "stinking thinking" today in an email meditation. It made me pause for a few moments because I've experienced a lot of stinky thoughts these past few weeks.  Some of these thoughts have been absolutely ridiculous and warped far from truth. It's like good ol' Satan has experienced loads of pre-Lenten fun inflaming my anxiety to a heighten level of negativity. I think others can relate to suffering from a bad case of pessimism.  It's no fun and causes so much useless fatigue.

Certainly, Jonah experienced a bad case of  stinkin' thinkin' when he disobeyed God's request to travel to Nineveh.  He tried to run away, but God forced him to swim around in that whale's belly.  I figure poor Jonah felt a little sorry for himself, wondering how he got stuck inside a blubbery mass in the first place!  Fortunately, Jonah recognized his sin, repented, and then went on to preach to the people at Nineveh.  The story has a happy ending as God decides to forgive the city for their transgressions.  They are all saved from God's blazing wrath.

How many times have we attempted to runaway from our problems?  How many times have said "No" to someone's request for help?  How many times have we pushed people away because we don't like what they do, think or say?

Take a chance!   We are only in the first week of Lent, so we have so many opportunities to change our ways, minds and hearts.  Most of us will "cheat" a little during our Lenten observance, but this is what makes us so viably human.  If conversion was an easy and painless endeavor, we wouldn't fall over and over again, begging for God's forgiveness and mercy.

 Lent is a special time for us to try the best we know how to let go of our sins and habits and realign ourselves more closely with God.  If Jonah can repent, and be forgiven by the Lord, so can we, too!

Immaculate Heart of Mary, Pray for Us!!

-J.

The Power of Prayer

Tuesday of the First Week of Lent

(Click Here for Readings)

Gospel of Matthew 6:7-15

Jesus said to his disciples: “In praying, do not babble like the pagans,who think that they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them. Your Father knows what you need before you ask him..."

Do you find prayer difficult or are you a prayer warrior?  Are you quick to respond, "I will keep you in my prayers" or rather silent?  I admit prayer is something that doesn't come natural to me.  I have to  schedule prayer time with God  in the early morning and evening hours or I won't do it at all.  I envy people who pray with ease.  It's like their hearts are naturally acclimated to holy dialogue with God.  How are they able to spontaneously communicate with God?  How are they able to quiet their minds and disconnect their hearts from egotism in order to pray for others?

I think pride can interfere with prayer life.  When we focus on ourselves and what we desire, our prayers become fruitless.  God may listen to us, but to his ears we are babbling on and on about stuff he doesn't necessarily think is good for us.  He wants us to pray for His will; leave all control to God!  He wants us to pray for the souls of others we may know or who are strangers to us.   Yes, if we have personal intentions we wish to petition God for, by all means pray for them.  Just be careful not to pray for things that are unnecessary, evil, or downright harmful.  With well formed consciences, we will realize what we pray for may not be for the best.

My parish has focused the Year 2015 on prayer.  I think this is a fantastic initiative.  We can all use advise on how to strengthen our prayer lives.  There are so many ways to pray that can easily fit in anyone's schedule.  There are simple prayers like the Our Father, the Hail Mary, or the Jesus Prayer. Liturgical prayer follows the Mass layout.  The Divine Office/Liturgy of the Hours are formal prayers said at designated times of the day.  Then there is contemplative prayer, Lectio Divina, and the Holy Rosary. Many people are gifted at simple mental prayer.  

The power of prayer is something we should not ignore!  Prayer really does work!  It's heals and saves.  It comforts.  It helps us through discernment.  It relaxes us and keeps us focused on the Lord.  Prayer as the "fruit of silence" helps us live holy and rich lives.  Sometimes we may believe God isn't listening to our prayers.  He's too buy saving others from eternal damnation.  However, God does hear our petitions.  He loves our praises of thanksgiving as well as our petitions for help.  We must learn to be patient with God because he will answer us in due course time.  God is known to give us what we least expect, surprising us with "answers" to our prayers in subtle ways.  We should always be alert and aware.  Even if God doesn't give us exactly what we wish, in the long run things normally work out for the better!  

Pray the "Our Father" sometime during the course of the day and always remember God knows what we need before we even ask!

Blessed  Constantius Servoli of Fabriano, Dominican Friar and Priest, Pray for Us!

-J.

Lenten Haikus - Part II

 

Pray without ceasing:

Stretch the mind - open the heart,

Never give up hope.

Fasting to fullness:

Like dryness in the desert,

Cleansing water for the soul.

Almsgiving changes:

Enriching heart mind and soul

Feeding with mercy.

A Wintry Day Poem 

Wintry mix and frigid chill

Early blossoms spent and ill

Blooming too soon, Nature not through,

Blanketing earth icicles of dew.

Snow and frost stay for now,

Dreary the air, many more clouds.

Darkness of winter, stubbornness of light

Cold seeps through, taking over night.

Where's God's warmth? Where's Christ's fire?

Where's the spark of holy most desire?

All I feel is coldness; All I want is wholeness

All I feel is sadness; All I want is gladness

All I feel is rejection; All I want is admiration

To be loved, to be held, to be cherished, and to Be 

Treated as a precious human being. 

Jesus is the one and only!

-J.

Icy Indifference

Today, the city of Dallas is pretty much shut down.  My business is closed as well as all area school districts.  A nasty winter storm is ravaging the Metroplex.  Since around 6 am this morning, non-stop freezing rain accumulates on the streets.  Outside is dead quiet except for the ice pellets hitting the roof and windows of my house.  Hopefully, everybody is warm inside homes and safe away from the frigid elements.  I pray the homeless have found refuge at a local shelter.

During inclement weather days like today is the best time to write!  One word that penetrates my thoughts, and concerns me a great deal, is indifference.  Pope Francis speaks about the globalization of indifference.  It has become a world wide problem.  I see indifference everywhere I turn from people throwing fast food containers on the streets to people walking past another with their heads down absorbed in their own thoughts.  

I even noticed snippets of indifference at an animal charity event I participated in this past weekend.  Among the artwork, cocktails and music a group of animal lovers displayed subtle chilliness.  Very few looked at me (or my mom) with a smile or responded with a thanks for being here in support of homeless animals. It's hard to describe the atmosphere but it was way different from Catholic charity events I regularly participate in.  Some say animal lovers are not really people persons.  Yes, maybe there is a little truth in this statement . But, I think it's just a result of the overall culture of indifference in society today.  The words Thank-You are a rare utterance!

Humans are so wrapped up in themselves and their own issues that they often fail to notice others around them.  They pass people on the streets without a smile.  They walk around more in tuned to their electronic devices than to their friends, coworkers, or even family members.  They have adapted to the culture of indifference without a care! I sincerely believe this indifference tears us away from God and our call to Christian discipleship. 

Have you ever met a person who could care less about you?  He/she never returns emails, texts, or phone calls.  Conversations are brief and rather superficial.  Perhaps the person is attractive and charming; the "perfect" person to be acquainted with.  Yet, the person could care less about you as a person.  Indifferent people are always too busy; they make up excuses as to why they don't make time for you or anyone else.  Sadly you may die tomorrow and the indifferent person will not even mourn your loss.....

I think showing indifference toward others is even worse than showing emotions like anger and sadness.  No wonder so many marriages break up, businesses fail, and crimes are committed.  Indifference is like a silent plague not easily identifiable.  It doesn't scream out like the Ebola virus.  It doesn't strike people dead in a matter of a short few weeks; however, it leaves a person emotionally and sometimes spiritually dead over the course of a lifetime.

What I find even more unconscionable is when clergymen show indifference toward members of their congregations.  This happens more often than we care to admit.  Our clergy are often overworked and worn down.  The last thing they feel like doing is showing true compassion, empathy, and caring toward someone they find irritating, annoying, or not at their "level" of spirituality.  I'm using pastors as an example because I think many people stray away from the Catholic Church because they feel like their priests simply do not care about them or their existence.  We all strive to be a wanted part of a community!  We all look up to our clergymen with reverence and high respect.  But when we receive thoughtless and indifferent responses in return we drift away, often leaving the Church permanently.

Today's culture has taught us that indifference is somehow okay.  It's a personal choice to be cold as ice or as hot as a roaring fire.  However, from a Christian perspective indifference is NOT okay.  Anyone who has ever encountered the tap of Indifference's icy fingers understands that the chill is not a pleasant experience. It leaves the person feeling hollow and empty inside.  Does anyone love her?  Does anyone care about him?  Are they just invisible individuals left to be alone for all of eternity?

As we all go through our busy lives, let us push away indifference and replace it with compassion and empathy.  Smile at the stranger.  Compliment a coworker.  Say thank-you more often.  Listen to someone who has something to share.  Be present and notice the environment, especially the people in it.  Get out of the self and more "in tune" with our fellow brothers and sisters no matter what!

Please read Pope Francis' Message for Lent:  "Make Your Hearts Firm"

Saint Polycarp, Pray for Us!

-J.

A Rainbow in the Desert

First Sunday of Lent 2015

One afternoon as I commuted home from work, I noticed the biggest and brightest rainbow.  I drove 70 mph straight into the colored prism beam.  What would await at the end?  A leprechaun pot of gold or precious pooches who made it across the rainbow bridge?  No, nothing of that sort.  Just a beautiful reminder of what we read about in Genesis:  God's promise to never destroy the earth again by flooding waters; a bow symbolizes this promise.  By the time I reached home, the rainbow was gone as rain droplets continued to fall from sunlit skies.  Quite a strange phenomenon during this time of the year when rain normally dumps from full black clouds.  I felt like God was smiling from heaven!

Mark's gospel recounts Jesus' temptation and fasting in the desert for forty days and forty nights. The Evangelist leaves out much of the details.  While meditating I wondered:  Did Jesus happen to observe a rainbow during his forty days in the desert?  If so, did the colorful spectrum provide him with the courage necessary to push away Satan's relentless provoking?  

During this period of Lent, we've entered our own desert experience.  We're praying, fasting, and giving alms.  We've made resolutions to give up old habits as we strive to form new ones.  But be warned: Satan is not giving up hope that we will slip, trip, and fall, deciding to give up on changing our lives for the better.  In fact, he enjoys when anxiety and negativity enter our minds:

Uh, I won't ever be able to give up drinking for a seven weeks!....  I can't let go of television for so long of a period of time.....Confession?  It's just not for me!.... Try to be nice to that irritating moron at work who bothers the dickens out of me?....Uh!  Who needs Lent!  What a waste of breathe!

Don't allow Satan to wrap his tentacles around your hearts.  He is trying his darkest to tempt you into bad behavior.  He has a way at picking at your vulnerabilities like an itchy old scab which never heals.  Fortunately, shooing away the Angel of Lies is an easy undertaking, especially during Lent. It just takes faith, hope, love, and charity.  Those four little words are like poisonous venom to the Devil.   The Lord provides us with a vast selection of spiritual weapons.  Power up with frequent holy communion.  Repent through fasting and alms.  Pray the rosary, a Chaplet to a favorite Saint, or a litany of protection to Saint Michael the Archangel.  Pray novenas.  Do whatever it takes to keep Satan away!  If the Lord was able to resist temptation while undergoing the 40 day desert experience we can, too!

-J.

Thaw Out to Perfection

Saturday of the First Week of Lent

Gospel of Matthew 5:43-47

So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect.

A snow storm blew through the DFW Metroplex yesterday. Many businesses closed early.  A record  2 inches of snow accumulated at the airport, not seen since 1934!  Certainly this has been a crazy winter in North Texas.  I've literally been shut in for two days with cabin fever settling in.  I can tell my dachshund is going a little doggy crazy.  Her barking at everything under the cloudy skies, chiefly out of boredom, causes a nonstop headache.   Puppy needs a nice long walk; I need a couple of Aleve!

I've taken several cat naps,  in and out of viewing episodes of "House of Cards Season 3."  Nothing better than to curl up in front of a good television series when bad weather keeps me stuck inside.  After I read through Morning Prayer and the scripture readings of the day, I took a long and hot aromatherapy bath.  The essence of cinnamon leaf oil, neroli, rosewood, and thyme allowed me to imagine away my current state of boredom. I do some of my best thinking in the bath or shower.  

A question formed in my mind as I listened to water dripping from the roof.  Thaw out at last!

How can I be perfect like God the Father?  

I rustle with the idea of perfection.  Is it truly attainable on this earth, or is perfection waiting for us in heaven?  We can follow God's commandments.  We can learn to love our enemies and serve others.  We can practice virtues instead of vices.  However, we are still imperfect human beings!  We still get in bad moods and make mistakes.  We don't always love as much as we should.  Plus, we can be egotistical at times.  So being perfect like God is perfect appears to be an impossible goal!

Times throughout my life I've tried to be the "perfect" student, employee, writer, friend, and even Catholic.  In my quest for perfection, it only causes stress, and to a certain extent, an elevated ego.  This is so contrary to God's idea of being perfect.  He doesn't lift himself up as morally superior or judge people as if they will never amount to anything.  He accepts people as he creates them, flawed and all, but only asks that we try our best to live a holy life.  When we do make mistakes, repent and ask for forgiveness.  Make it a goal to live a good life; a life loving and serving others. Enemies will always lurk behind the scenes or straight ahead.  Yet, Christ calls us to still love and respect them.  Praying for a conversion of their harden hearts is a great way of demonstrating such love.

Thaw out to perfection.  Let go of the chilliness of hate and replace it with the warmth of love.  Allow the ice cubes of indifference and unfair judgment melt away into potable water.  Life is transformed more perfect when we live a life close to God.

-J.

Lenten Cleansing Effects

Saturday After Ash Wednesday

(Click Here for Readings)

Isaiah 58: 9b-48

Thus says the LORD: If you remove from your midst oppression, false accusation and malicious speech; If you bestow your bread on the hungry and satisfy the afflicted; Then light shall rise for you in the darkness, and the gloom shall become for you like midday; Then the LORD will guide you always and give you plenty even on the parched land. He will renew your strength, and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring whose water never fails.

As a baby Lay Dominican candidate (novice) just admitted to the Order of Preachers last December, I find myself a little overwhelmed by the endless amount of reading material on Dominican Spirituality. I'm not quite sure where to start or what to focus on.  Everything piques my interest, to a certain extent.  The more scholarly articles are bookshelfed for a while longer.  I'm starting off with the easier to understand writings.

Recently, I grabbed a bio on Saint Dominic to get a feel for what kind of person he was. Wow, talk about an inspiring man who practiced penance every day of his life and not only during Lent!  He prayed into the wee hours of the night, often forgoing sleep.  He fasted from meat daily, often eating sparse meals.  He regularly gave clothing off of his own back to the poor.  All of the penances he performed with a cheery countenance and not one hint of despair!  This is quite a miracle in itself since most of us are quick to moan and groan, huff and puff when the Church requires us to attend Mass every Sunday and take communion/ confess sins once a year.   This doesn't seem like that difficult of an obligation.  Why only partake in the Church's sacraments once a year and miss out on deep spiritual cleansing?!  I don't want the filth and stench of my sins to linger around too long, rotting away my soul.  I want to bath regularly under Christ's healing shower, staying fresh and clean!

Perhaps a great practice to adopt in Lent 2015 is attending daily mass more often and amping up time in the confessional!  Trust me, priests have heard it all, so no need to be embarrassed if it's been a while since you last confessed mortal sins.   Certainly regular reception of The Eucharist and confession has a tremendous cleansing effect on our souls.

Furthermore, meditating on scripture and praying the Liturgy of the Hours waters our souls daily.  Christ's aqua jug helps our souls grow and bloom.  I know days when I don't have the time to read the mass scripture verses or daily Psalter I feel droopy.  The rose living inside my heart is thirsty and needs just a sprinkle of holy water to revive.

Having maintained this blog for about two years now, I've  noticed the same scripture readings cycle over and over.  It's a challenge to write from a different perspective.  Sometimes scripture doesn't quite speak to me as profoundly as months or years earlier.  As a result, I like to gather ideas from the writings from the Saints, the Popes, and even lay persons.  Moreover, I regularly look at reflections from our Protestant brothers and sisters.  I believe strongly in ecumenical outreach, especially since I originate from a Protestant background, so sometimes I turn to non-Catholic religious sources for inspiration. (Please don't think I'm a bad Catholic for paying attention to what our fellow Christian brothers and sisters of other denominations are preaching!)

I'd like to close today's meditation with words from Rev. Don Underwood, pastor at Christ United Methodist Church in Plano, TX.  He is a phenomenal preacher along with his assistant ministers.  (I'm happy to say the church has women pastors, too!)  I enjoy listening to the church's sermons recorded on their website.  Here are words from Rev. Underwood's recent email message:

"The journey through Lent can be dark and somewhat solitary. That is how it is meant to be. But it comes with its own rewards. It provides the opportunity to set aside the perky little aphorisms about having a great day in return for an even richer experience of being in the presence of the God who creates the day. Of being held by the God who watches over us during the night. Experiencing those moments when we know, without any doubt, that we belong to God." 

Saint Martin de Porres, Pray for Us!

-J.

Fast with a Contrite Spirit

Friday After Ash Wednesday 

(Click Here for Readings)

Isaiah 58: 1-9A

This, rather, is the fasting that I wish: releasing those bound unjustly, untying the thongs of the yoke; Setting free the oppressed, breaking every yoke; Sharing your bread with the hungry, sheltering the oppressed and the homeless; Clothing the naked when you see them, and not turning your back on your own.Then your light shall break forth like the dawn, and your wound shall quickly be healed...

Well, well, today is the First Friday of Lent.  Are you ready to abstain from meat again this week?  As a semi-vegetarian, it's not so difficult for me personally. Normally I eat fish on Fridays anyway, so it's not that big of a change.  I think going without my Friday night bottle of vino is more of a sacrifice!! However, for so many others the no-meat thing is rough.  I've heard of folks taking a bite of a burger or a steak on a Lenten Friday, totally forgetting about the required fast.  I'm sure Our Lord is quick to forgive.....

I've noticed over the years how fast food chains are marketing Lent to their advantage. Burger joints, such as Wendy's, offer "for a limited-time-only" fish sandwiches.  Other sit and dine restaurants showcase their seafood specials on the menu's front page.  Restaurants know that the Lenten "fast" is a huge business opportunity.  I wonder if seafood establishments like Long John Silver's and Red Lobster make most of their yearly revenue off of Fridays of Lent. 

If one considers the matter of fasting more closely, Lent seems to be the only time of the year where it's a primary focus of our faith.  Certainly, the bible talks about fasting a lot, and we should consider fasting more often.  But, do we really pay attention to true meaning of fasting during other times of the year?  I think when most of us think about "fasting" we think about not eating before our yearly blood work and physical examination.  (Yuck!)  Or, we go through a "cleansing and lose-the-weight- quick fast" as we subject our bodies to copious amount of lemon-infused water, herbal concoctions, and fiber-rich foods. (With many trips to the bathroom as a side effect!)

Fasting has quite a negative reputation.  We see pictures of young African children wasting away because they don't have enough food to eat.  Their fasting is not purposeful with a spiritual intention but more of a fasting out of necessity.  They simply do not have enough food to nourish their bodies.  Then there are others who fast on purpose, again not for the intention of honoring God but as a side effect of deep psychiatric illness.  Those with Anorexia and Bulimia use food as a way of controlling their self images.  They literally starve and purge themselves to make themselves feel better.

Fasting shouldn't be something we do to punish or hurt ourselves.  It should be done with a contrite spirit; that is, a spirit of deep repentance for our sins.  Fasting shouldn't be a gloomy endeavor, and certainly not something that we complain about.  In fact, fasting is inter-related with prayer and almsgiving.  All three are holy actions. As we fast we pray and as we fast we give alms!  Prayer unites together fasting and almsgiving, encouraging us to remove our selfish tendencies, and with humble contrition, donate our time, talents and treasure in service to others.

So fast with a contrite spirit and pray for others!

-J.

Lenten Haikus - Part I

Christ nailed to a tree:

He died for our salvation

The Sky cries aloud.

Lenten promises:

Ashes of sin fade away.

Our hearts beat to rest.

 


  Christ and Easter eggs:
  New life begins with a crack
  Yolk of freedom bound.

 

Take Up Your Cross - A Sacrament of Salvation

Thursday After Ash Wednesday

(Click Here for Readings)

Gospel of Luke 9:22-25

“If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. What profit is there for one to gain the whole world yet lose or forfeit himself?”


The Gospel readings in the Liturgy remind us over and over again to take up our cross and follow Jesus.  Easier said than done!  Our "crosses" are very heavy.  They give us headaches and backaches; splinters and cuts; bumps and bruises.   We simply get tired of carrying around so much burden.  If it wasn't for the Lenten Season, I think most of us rather burn our crosses and possibly even run away from Jesus like cowardly lions! We think Christ's mighty crosswalk isn't so safe.  I mean, there's the chance of a car running over us because the weight of our wood beams slow us down.  We walk at a snail's pace rather than at a roadrunner's prance with all of that extra weight on our backs.

Personally, I felt a huge weight lifted from my shoulders after I received my ashes on Dirty Forehead Wednesday.  My cross is still there, but it feels lighter.  It's as if I played a bowling game with Jesus himself!  The first bowling ball weighed a ton and was difficult to roll without pulling a muscle. I could barely strike down even one pin. As the rounds continued, my bowling ball size changed into a lighter weight!  I was able to finally make a strike!  All those pins of habitual sin went down on impact!  God allowed me to win the bowling game by forgiving my sins.  The only request he asks of me is to bear my cross with humility.  Don't carry my burdens alone but rely on God to get me through the tough times!

One of the intercessions in today's Divine Office Morning prayer resonated with me in a very deep way.  Not very often do intercessions do this.  The key words are "sacrament of salvation."

Teach us to enter more deeply into the mystery of the Church, that it may be more effective for ourselves and for the world as the sacrament of salvation.

I ponder the questions:  By taking up my cross and following Jesus with humility and courage, am I participating in the sacrament of salvation?  Am I showing to others that I truly believe in God and his plan for my life?  Can I continue to follow the "mystery" surrounding Catholic theology and teachings without understanding all of the what, whys, and hows?  My analytical mind typically wants solid answers to questions.  It can sometimes be a challenge for me to accept things that I simply do not understand; however, that's why it's so important that I keep the faith!

As part of my lenten observance, I am reading Fenelon's Classic work "Let Go" (publisher Whitaker).  In Letter 2, this wise and inspiring  17th century Archbishop of Cambrai, France wrote:

"A cross which comes from God ought to be welcomed without any concern for self.  And when you accept your cross this way, even though it is painful, you will find that you can bear it in peace.  But when you receive the cross unwillingly, you will find it to be doubly severe.  The resistance within is harder to bear than the cross itself!  But if you recognize the hand of God, and make no opposition to His Will, you will have peace in the midst of affliction...."

-J.

Ash Wednesday 2015: The Blessing of Forgiveness

Ash Wednesday 2015

"May you be blessed, my God, for although I am unworthy of any benefits, yet your nobility and infinite goodness never cease to do good even for those who are ungrateful and far from you.  Convert us to you, that we may be thankful, humble, and devout, for you are our salvation, and our strength." -Venerable Thomas A Kempis

For the first time ever, I took a vacation day on Ash Wednesday.  Normally I wait to go to mass until late in the evening, but this year I want it to be a "Wow Factor" lenten experience.  I'm attending 8 am mass and then plan to run  errands around town.  I won't be at all embarrassed by the ashen cross on my forehead.  In fact, it will make a great conversational piece.  I'm Catholic and proud of it!

I remember the first time I ever noticed ashes on the forehead.  It was my sophomore year in college.  I didn't realize that Texas A&M had a huge Catholic ministry.  (I was still a lukewarm Protestant who occasional went to Sunday church service.) Several of my sorority sisters attended our weekly meeting wearing the distinctive dirt.  After I found what the ashes represented, I secretly wish I could receive a blessing, too.  I thought it was only a "Catholic thing." Later I was pleased to find out anybody can receive ashes!  Although it would be several more years before I attended a Catholic Mass, and received ashes on my own forehead, I always thought it was a beautiful symbol of Christ's mercy: The blessing of forgiveness.

Have you made any a Lenten resolutions?  Have you given something up?  Personally, I've decided to give up drinking wine, except of course communion wine.  Wine is something I absolutely love.  However, sometimes when I drink little too much it unleashes my pessimism and negativity.  I'm bound and determined to remain optimistic this Lenten Season.    Moreover, I'm prepared to cast away the resentment, envy and anger that I've habitually harbored in my heart.  Give it all to God with a request:  Please remove these crippling vices and help me replace them with love and charity.  

Today after I receive my ashes, I will thank God for gifting us with the Catholic Church.  I will thank our Blessed Mother for her peaceful countenance.  I will thank Saint Michael the Archangel for his protection against evil.  I will thank Saint Dominic for focusing on the salvation of souls.  Most important of all, I will thank God for his love, mercy and willingness to forgive all sins.  

 Let us open the flood gates to repentance!  Let the conversion begin!

-J.

P.S.  For every bottle of wine I would normally purchase over a 40 day period, I will donate the monetary value to my parish.  ;)

Lent 2015: Prepare for A Flood of Conversion

Tuesday of the Sixth Week in Ordinary Time
"Shrove Tuesday"



Genesis 6:5-8; 7:1-5, 10

When the Lord saw how great was man's wickedness on earth, and how no desire that his heart conceived was ever anything but evil, he regreted that he had made man on the earth, and his heart was grieved. So the Lord said:  "I will wipe out from the earth the men whom I have created, and not only the men, but also the beasts and the creeping things and the birds of the air, for I am sorry that I made them."  But Noah found favor with the Lord.


When I read the story of Noah and the great flood, I think of the song Rock Steady from the artist Sting.  It's a jazzed-up lyrical interpretation of the Noah's ark story.  (click here for a live performance) 

Why does the Church read the story of Noah's ark the day before Lent starts?  It reminds us of our sinful natures.  For forty days and nights Noah and the  animals sailed on the ark, protected by the rising waters.  Life on the ark was far from comfortable.  Imagine food and fresh water in short supply; long days with no sunlight; and the overall stench!  Noah sacrificed those forty days trusting that the Lord will finally end the flood, and the earth will return normal.  Despite the discomfort, he praised God and thanked him for his life and the life of his fellow creatures.

 By contrast, during the forty days and nights of Lent we perform acts of penance in reparation for our sins.  In many respects, this is a time for a flood of conversion and not a flood of destruction! Christ desires to heal us!  God is no longer a revengeful disgruntled God like we read in the Old Testament.  He is a God of immense love.  He grants us infinite mercy when we acknowledge our smallness to His eternal greatness!

The Season of Lent is a time for us to take an inventory of our spiritual lives just like Noah "inventoried" the animals:  the unclean versus the clean.  Of course, more "clean" animals were allowed on the ark, but the unclean still had a place even if not prominent.....

Do we need to rid ourselves of bad habits and tendencies?  Do we need to adopt habits of virtue?   

 God decided to destroy the earth by water because of the wickedness of man.  Man didn't want to listen to God and follow his ways.  He decided to do thing things in ways that suited his own thirst for lust, decadence, debauchery, idol worship, murder and mayhem!  Scripture says our Lord's heart was greatly grieved; he felt sorry for ever creating man.  So, he came up with a master plan to wipe out the earth, only saving Noah and a few chosen creatures.

Just think about:  Jesus Christ didn't save only a few chosen creatures in male and female pairs.  He saved ALL of mankind by dying on a tree! His five bloody wounds forever granted us eternal salvation.

As you gorge yourselves on pancakes, King cake, beer, wine, or whatever your chosen "poison" on this Shrove Tuesday/Mardi Gras, prepare yourself for a flood of conversion.  This may be the Best Lent ever!  During your time of fasting, prayer and almsgiving, the "ah ha!" moment may strike when you decide to completely turn your life around!

Saint Dominic, Pray for Us!!

-J.

Raising Cain

Monday of the Sixth Week in Ordinary Time

(Click Here for Readings)


Genesis 4:1-15; 25

The LORD looked with favor on Abel and his offering,

but on Cain and his offering he did not. Cain greatly resented this and was crestfallen. So the LORD said to Cain:

“Why are you so resentful and crestfallen. If you do well, you can hold up your head; but if not, sin is a demon lurking at the door: his urge is toward you, yet you can be his master.”

The Holy Spirit works in mysterious ways.  When I need God the most, he makes his presence known.  Sometimes even when I don't think  I need God, and I can handle hardships by my little lonesome self, he sends forth a holy stare with  a holy smile!  I try to hide my eyes, but his glowing light is too intense.  I try to run away, but his grip is too tight!  God lets me know through my conscience, and sometimes even through another person's words, that my thoughts and actions are not pleasing to him.  Ranting and raving - as the old saying goes "raising Cain"-  doesn't do much good.  It harms relationships with others and disconnects us from the Lord.

For the past week, everywhere I turn the word resentment appears out of nowhere. I hear the word on the radio, read it in an article, or stumble across the word in the bible..  I think God is sending me a subliminal message:  Take hold of my own feelings of resentment and shove them out the door.  There's no reason to resent others.  There's no reason for me to harbor anger toward another person because he or she doesn't see things my way.  I think Satan uses resentment, anger and envy to toy with us; to make us focus on ourselves and less on others.

On February 14th, Pope Francis elected 20 new Cardinals.  Although none of the cardinals are from the United States, several of them live in more remote countries and dioceses.  In his homily, Pope Francis focused on the "hymn of charity" in St. Paul's Letter to the Corinthians. When I saw the word resentment once again pop up I immediately paid attention!  Even though his words are addressed to pastors, I think we all can relate:

"Charity, Saint Paul says, 'is not irritable, it is not resentful'. Pastors close to their people have plenty of opportunities to be irritable, to feel anger. Perhaps we risk being all the more irritable in relationships with our confreres, since in effect we have less excuses. Even here, charity, and charity alone, frees us. It frees us from the risk of reacting impulsively, of saying or doing the wrong thing; above all it frees us from the mortal danger of pent-up anger, of that smouldering anger which makes us brood over wrongs we have received. No. This is unacceptable in a man of the Church. Even if a momentary outburst is forgiveable, this is not the case with rancour. God save us from that!"

Oh, if Cain just listened to the Lord and didn't allow resentment to build up to the point of murder.  If he could have been proud and supportive of Abel, working peacefully together for the Lord.  If only he had not allowed Satan to take a hold of his heart leaving it bitter and angry.  

Are you a Cain or an Abel?  Do you see the world through the eyes of resentment and anger or love and charity?  Are you quick to feud and fight or bring about peace?  Do you listen to God, trying to live a quiet holy life, or do you turn a deaf ear, deciding to "raise Cain" through impulsive actions and words?  I think we can all be a little like Cain every once in a while; but, hopefully we use enough self-control not to get ourselves into a dangerous situation.

Next time you feel like raising Cain, take a few deep breaths and say the Jesus prayer!

-J.

Papal Wisdom As We Begin Lent This Week!

Garden of Delights

Sixth Sunday in Ordinary Time

(Click Here for Readings)

Gospel of Mark 1:40-45

A leper came to Jesus and kneeling down begged him and said, “If you wish, you can make me clean.” Moved with pity, he stretched out his hand, touched him, and said to him,“I do will it. Be made clean.” The leprosy left him immediately, and he was made clean. Then, warning him sternly, he dismissed him at once.

 I love art, especially religious and Asian Art. I wish I could spend more time in art museums.  Whenever I travel, I schedule a tour of the local museum.  The Art Institute of Chicago and the British National Portrait Gallery are my favorites.   Maybe one of these days I will sign up for an art appreciation course; an activity on my bucket list!

The Leper and the Garden of Delights  During a Google search, I came across Hieronymus Bosch's masterpiece "The Garden of Earthly Delights."  The triptych is an interpretation of the Adam and Eve Story.  My eyes instantly caught the detail of the river with the fish and the people swimming it.  This made me think of the leper in today's gospel reading.  Back in the time of Moses, those inflicted with leprosy were required to publicly acknowledge their uncleanliness and remain isolated, an outcast left alone to suffer. Once symptoms disappeared, lepers could reach out to a local priest for healing, and be cleansed in the river Jordan, but for those suffering from ongoing skin afflictions they were banned from the public waters.  Certainly, nobody would find a leper along with healthy individuals, frolicking about enjoying the warm water as if at a spa!  Lepers lived lives of constant pain, shame and suffering.  

Shoo!  Don't tell!  What I find so interesting is how Jesus warns the leper not to tell anyone about Him. (This is a common theme throughout the Gospel of Mark.  Nobody is to tell others about Jesus.)  But, wouldn't people naturally want to know the leper's story of healing?  No way to remain quiet about something so awesome!!  Naturally all of us want to share good news, especially if we come across a miracle.  I can totally understand why Our Lord desired to stay out of the public spotlight and for as long as possible.  With the positive attention comes along a lot of jealousy and hate, especially among the priests and scribes.  Think about how the paparazzi harass celebrities today.  Every detail of their public and private lives are monitored and quickly spread around.

We all experience some form of "leprosy."  It may not be in the form of scabs, rashes or sores but as emotional wounds.  Guilt and shame ravage our hearts to the point where we internally bleed out.  People say hurtful things to us.  Loved ones ignore us.  Others bully us around.  How difficult to imagine swimming around in the Garden of Delights when we see ourselves trapped in the Dead Sea.

Our sufferings are meant to strengthen us and bring us closer to God.  If we live free from physical pain and mental anguish, would there be a need for prayer?  If everything was perfectly fine, and we possessed everything we ever desired, would there be a need to Trust in God?  If suffering no longer existed in the world, we'd forget all about the meaning of Christ crucified.  We may even go so far as to no longer celebrate 40 days of Lent or even Easter!  

I love these inspiring words from Leon Bloy published in today's Magnificat Meditation of the Day:

"Suffering is necessary.  It is the backbone, the very essence of moral life.  Love is recognized by this sign, and when the sign is lacking, love is but a prostitution of strength or of beauty.  I say that someone loves me when that someone consents to suffer through or for me....There is but one sorrow and that is to have lost the Garden of Delights, and there is one hope and one desire, to recover it."

Sacred Heart of Jesus, Pray for Us!

-J.