A Major Change on the Horizon

Wednesday of the Eighteenth Week in Ordinary Time

"Remember us, O Lord, as you favor your people."

This evening as I type this brief meditation my head is in a tailspin.  Some BIG changes are on the horizon.   I'm nervous, anxious, excited, and fearful.  I don't quite know how my final game plan will turn out.  I'm weighing my options and doing the research.  I'm praying to the Lord above for a little divine intervention.  Ideas are rushing into my brain  like waves from the Reed Sea, crashing against the delicate neurons.  Hopefully I will stay sane through the next few months...

What's going on?  I'm starting the process of selling my house.  Ever since I took a job at a lower salary and with a long commute, I've struggled financially.  It's gotten to the point my home needs some needed improvements that I cannot afford without going into deeper debt. So, the best option is  to sell.  A part of me feels the release of a huge burden, but then the other side feels a loss.  It's like I failed at achieving the American dream.  I'm disappointed at myself for having to return back to noisy and cramped apartment living.  Then again, maybe the Lord is pushing me to sell.  The housing market in my area is super hot.  It's definitely a seller's market.  I may be able to  make a nice enough profit that will provide me with a fully-equipped emergency fund and extra savings.

I do not know what God has planned for me in the next 12 months, but for the first time in several years I think it's another major turning point in my life.  I've always loved to travel, yet this house has kept me from going to places I want to go.  I've always wanted to become more social; however, living out so far away from most fun events keeps me home bound.  I've always wanted to be able to save more money for emergencies and retirement, yet unexpected home repairs and maintenance overstretch my budget.

A home can be a huge blessing but also a curse....

Honestly, I shouldn't be too hard on myself.  I was able to afford a mortgage as a single woman.  That's an accomplishment in itself.  Some families can never afford a home on their own. 

I thank God for giving me the wisdom to realize when it's time to let go, time to make a change, and time to move on.

If selling this house is what is meant to be, everything will go smoothing just like when I first bought my adorable little home.  I think it's time to pass it along to new owners who can hopefully enjoy and care for it as much as I do. 

God favors his people at all times.  When we are unloving and unkind, he forgives.  When we are ungrateful and unappreciative, he still loves.  When he knows it's time for a life change, he is there as our guide.

-J.